Over the next few pages, I will explain some of the many different coping strategies / techniques that have been shown to be effective, in the management of stress. I must reiterate that stress cannot be 'CURED'. Stress is a biological function that is beyond our control, and is something we need to attain our goals. So why learn stress management techniques you may be asking? We cannot control the biological effect of stress or the physiological changes in the stress response. Nevertheless, we can, begin to control our actual response to stress and stress provoking situations. We can also identify possible events that may cause stress in our lives. By doing that, we are able to some degree; control the overall effect stress has on our body. Stress is needed in our lives and one must remember it also has a good effect as well as bad.
When it is good, we use the term 'EUSTRESS' and when bad, the term is 'DISTRESS'. The ability to react quickly when in a situation that requires it is good; this is stress at its best. Some examples, waiting to see your boss because they have called you to the office can be stressful maybe distressing. Preparing oneself for a 'date' is also stressful; this is normally not seen as distressing. Yet, the body reacts in exactly the same biological manner, but our response to the situation provides the ability for stress to be seen as good or bad. Most people do understand and use the word distress frequently, but fewer people understand let alone use the word 'eustress'.
Stress has been around since man evolved. It is our body's way of getting physically and mentally prepared to fight or flee. I am sure you will have heard of the "FIGHT and FLIGHT syndrome". On a future page, I include a list of the physiological responses to stress. Along with a point to point breakdown of the '"FIGHT and FLIGHT syndrome".
Stress is different for each person. What one person considers stressful another may find enjoyable. Do not worry about this, we are all individuals, which means we react differently. There is nothing wrong in this. There are many ways of dealing with the emotions caused by stress, some better than others. Often people may turn to having a drink to 'UNWIND' but drinking can and does become a problem in itself. Thereby causing more stress! Some may become physically, or verbally aggressive and may take it out on those close to them, and themselves. Neither of these is pleasant, let alone productive. Sadly, they do happen if nothing is done to help reduce the amount of stress one experiences. Or if they change the way they deal with stress, hitting their spouse because the boss added more work on their desk, is NOT going to reduce the workload. It will cause more tension and stress in the home, possibly causing a divorce, thereby further increasing stress levels. At the end of the day, everyone, and I do mean everyone, would benefit from learning and USING some extra coping techniques. These not only help with stress reduction, but they help deal with the physiological aspects of stress. Overall, they can also help reduce other stress related problems.
Why add more stress to ones life, when by learning a few different and effective coping techniques one could reduce the build up of tension, aches and pains, headaches, etc in other words STRESS. It is important to note that the techniques presented on the following pages have been proven to work effectively in reducing stress and its effects. BUT BEFORE YOU FOLLOW THEM, PLEASE SEEK MEDICAL ADVICEThere is no guarantee that all of them will work for you; we tend to find some are more helpful than others. This is due to individuality and should not be seen as negative if one finds some are of little use. As long as the information has been learnt and the techniques practised daily for a number of weeks, you have given yourself the best chance of adapting to the stressful life of today's society. Even if the technique does not produce the results one may have hoped, you will still have gained from the experience. Increased knowledge also takes you one step closer to understanding yourself, which means you are one stop closer at understanding what you need. Stress management training works because it is presented in a systematic way. It uses all parts of the body and mind. Stress is taken apart with a step-by-step approach, so one can understand it from the ground up. Stress management works via a systematic re-building approach from the ground up. This requires 100% commitment and willingness to practise and learn. This then means the individual (YOU) are in complete control over how much you gain from the training. It also means you will be in complete control over the effects stress has on your body and mind.
My approach to stress and stress management is A HOLISTIC ONE. It is geared for the individual, YOU. As you may or may not be aware, there are many techniques, some more effective than others. This sites aim is to help you understand the techniques a little more, so that when a consultant starts discussing a technique you will already have a basic understanding. My other hope is that it will be able to help you decide if stress management training is for you. My role is a guide, teacher as it were. My aim is to help you identify your strengths and weaknesses in relation to stress and life. This will automatically help you to focus on the sole areas you need to and not spend hours on areas you are already strong at - it would be a waste of time. Yes, we can always improve our strengths, but first we must have all compartments equal. Thereby reducing stress and its effects including the effects, it already has had on your body. Including the effects, it already has had on your mind and body.
Stress management is NOT a quick fix solution it requires commitment. For you to see or feel any improvement you have to really commit yourself to the sessions, the homework, which normally consists of listening to a tape/CD everyday and writing scores / thoughts/ etc down. This site will explain the different techniques predominantly used and give information along with a few questionnaires all aiming to help you decide if you need / want any help. I will not be providing relaxation scripts, as I believe that it is always wise to have a professional guide you through the different techniques. By having a professional present if any problems / concerns crop up they can be dealt with immediately. I have made a small relaxation room, click here RELAXATION ROOM I shall be adding other small rooms of different exercises. Recording your own script is quite difficult as there are a few skill required to obtain and provide yourself with the best experience. There are many relaxation tapes on the market I have produced a number of different CD's which can ONLY be purchased with an information pack. Please EMAIL for more information. Packs start at £30 plus P&P
One of the most important lessons I teach is, it is ultimately up to you how much or how little you gain from the experience. All of the sessions require some degree of 'homework'. This is not like being at school, there is no such thing as failing, and there are no tests! Like anything in life, you do get out what you put in. It is always useful to remember that you are doing this for yourself, to help yourself. You are not wasting your time because this is an important and often crucial learning experience as it can improve your health. If you begin to miss a day of practice you are only hurting yourself, the more practise the better the result. Your health is important; your time spent listening to your tape/CD is valuable time and can be found if wanted. If you can find the time to do your favourite hobby, then you can find the time to look after your health and improve your standard of living. By not practising, you are only making your life harder to live.
I always suggest to practice each technique for 6 - 8 weeks as this will ingrain the exercise in the mind so the skill can be used without the tape. Most of the techniques contain two elements; relaxation and a coping technique. Both are important, once an exercise is learnt the coping strategy can be utilised. The coping strategy will help one deal with stress and stressful events. For example, one exercise I use, the individual counts down from ten to one to get to a deep relaxation. At this point, an image is used where they feel safe, calm, at ease and relaxed. It is this image and feelings that I would want a client to be able to feel instead of their previous norm in a stressful situation. How is this done? If one knows a certain event causes stress, one can count down from ten to one, recall the image and the feelings of calmness, at ease, etc and begin to feel those through the stressful event. This means that one would be using a coping technique before, during, and after an event. If one feels stressful, they can count down, focus on the image and the accompanying feelings of calmness etc, thereby changing their emotions and no longer having their original stressful feelings. The counting down, focusing on the image and feelings can be done as frequently as required.
A questionnaire follows to help you see how well you cope with stress. It will show your strengths and weaknesses. This can help you identify areas you may wish / need to focus on, and areas that you already have good coping skills. Remember honesty pays if the result is not one you expected, this is not something to worry about. With honesty comes a greater degree of accuracy in deciding which techniques could be of more use, along with the areas to focus on. It does show your STRENGTHS which may provide you with a pleasant surprise or two!
In the sessions we have to focus specifically on your stressors, develop, and enhance your coping strategies / techniques etc. It is a partnership, which can only be effective and useful if you approach it with an open and willing manner. There will be times when you may doubt the process, or even your own progress. However, by the end of the training sessions you will have learnt some if not all of the most effective coping techniques AND gained a lot of useful information which will also reduce stress, the more we know about a subject the less we fear it. Especially those that YOU YOURSELF have found MOST useful.
Only you will know truthfully how successful a strategy is for you. I (or another qualified person) can only explain and teach the techniques. You have to do the homework - practice the techniques. Like anything in life, if its worth having its worth the practice and patience. Do not forget we may be dealing with years and years of poor habits, but these techniques do work. You may be thinking I don't have the time to do all this, I can assure you that 30 minuets a day is not that difficult to find; IF YOU WANT TO FIND IT! Consider it as 'YOUR TIME' - solely for you. If you do not practice the technique, it cannot become a subconscious act. You will never know if that technique could have been the one to stop your headaches, etc. If you know there is a problem, you have to be prepared to work on it. Just doing the exercise in a session is not enough, practise is required, for it to work consistently and for it to become a subconscious act.
Before you proceed, PLEASE SEEK MEDICAL ADVICE OR OPINIONS. I would also like to reiterate a few more points already made. One of the aims of these exercises is for you to become more aware of your internal emotions / feelings. During the exercise and afterwards a few new feelings / sensations may be noted. As the exercises is to increase awareness these emotions may have already been present, but have been sat on to deal with later, so to speak. Some possible reactions during the exercises are:-
1. Jerking.
2. Muscle spasms.
3. Rapid blinking.
4. Feel strange/different.
5. Tingling sensations.
6. Fall asleep - due to tension being tiring.
7. Relaxation loosens our control - which may bring past pain or unresolved issues to the front.
ALL OF THESE ARE NORMAL AND SHOULD PASS, PLEASE DISCUSS THESE SENSATIONS WITH YOUR CONSULTANT SHOULD THEY OCCUR.
With all these techniques the possibility of all of them not working is extremely low. We can only do so much and unfortunately we cannot stop difficult sensations/feelings/memories from surfacing.
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